Dear Mr. President, I am angry. For most of this year, our country has been paralyzed. Many of us have completely changed our lives, canceled important once-in-a-lifetime events, lost our jobs, lost our healthcare, and waved to our loved ones from across the street or via video chat. Some are nervously sending kids back to … Continue reading On Behalf of the Grieving
I saw a childhood friend a few weeks ago whose fiance passed away in August after a horrible battle with cervical cancer. I've felt so much of what she's feeling right now, but I have no idea what it's like to be a partner's primary caretaker for a year and a half, a uniquely painful … Continue reading Grief How-To: Thank You Cards
When John died and my entire world came to an abrupt halt in February of 2017, it felt like everyone I loved paused with me for a moment. Friends ditched work to be by my side at the hospital, the funeral, the cemetery, and lots of blurry days in between and afterwards. A few weeks … Continue reading When the World Stands Still
Before you lose someone close to you, there's a common misconception that one day you will "move on" from the loss. Even in the early part of my grief journey, I was chasing the day that my broken heart would heal and I would move on from John's death. That was survival mode talking. 3.5 … Continue reading Always Moving Forward, Never Moving On
2020 is largely a dumpster fire. There are plenty of things that I'm still grateful for - the best parents and brother, Eli, Hirt baby, Ollie, my savings account, evenings on the balcony, etc - but I really believe the year in its entirety is the root cause of my shingles. This year has robbed … Continue reading Grieve the Important Things, Even If They Are Only Important to You
I was laid off on July 1. Obviously being unemployed is not ideal (especially with that $600/week coming to an end), but I'm using this as an opportunity to dig my heals into the Portland nonprofit world. Working remotely for my job in Indy was great in so many ways. There's a lot to be … Continue reading Coastal Getaway with a Side of Shingles
Today I made the Salty Buckwheat Chocolate Chunk Cookies from Bon Appétit. This particular batch has a nice origin story. It begins with a no-contact flour exchange with my friend Allison (she with the buckwheat flour, me with the coconut flour), and ends with a delectable plate of cookies that I will eat all by … Continue reading Who Knew Pete Holmes Was so Profound?
Today has mostly been a drawn-out argument with the paper cut on the tip of my right thumb. It's deep and painful and I'm sick of it holding my thumb hostage. I miss being able to use my thumb. I also have three other paper cuts across my two hands because I spent a long … Continue reading Dispatch from Quarantine
Someone asked me recently if I've been writing. He asked me why when I told him no and I said, "Because I'm happy." Saying that was equal parts true, false, and made me feel like a phony. It's true because I'm pleased to share that for the most part, I am happy. It's also false … Continue reading Avoiding
There, I said it. We're just over a week out from the 2-year anniversary of John's death. Boggles the mind. The last two years have been a series of ups and downs, and I'd venture to say more ups than downs. I've tried my hardest to make the best out of a shitty situation and … Continue reading Grief’s a Bitch
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